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[#] Mon Jun 24 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: Situation

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We're right under the flight path for the scheduled orbital launch, but don't worry--it's too cold out for the rockets to operate safely, so I'm sure they'll postpone.

https://xkcd.com/2950/

[#] Wed Jun 26 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: Bad Map Projection: Exterior Kansas

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Although Kansas is widely thought to contain the geographic center of the contiguous 48 states, topologists now believe that it's actually their outer edge.

https://xkcd.com/2951/

[#] Fri Jun 28 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: Routine Maintenance

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The worst was the time they accidentally held the can upside down and froze all the Earth's magma chambers solid.

https://xkcd.com/2952/

[#] Mon Jul 01 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: Alien Theories

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They originally came here to try to investigate our chemtrail technology, and got increasingly frustrated when all their samples turned out to just be water ice with trace amounts of jet exhaust.

https://xkcd.com/2953/

[#] Wed Jul 03 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: Bracket Symbols

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’"‘”’" means "I edited this text on both my phone and my laptop before sending it"

https://xkcd.com/2954/

[#] Fri Jul 05 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: Pole Vault

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Ugh, and we JUST went through this yesterday with javelin.

https://xkcd.com/2955/

[#] Mon Jul 08 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: Number Line Branch

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Attention all passengers: This is an express sequence to infinity. If your stop is not a power of two, please disembark now.

https://xkcd.com/2956/

[#] Wed Jul 10 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: A Crossword Puzzle

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Hint: If you ever encounter this puzzle in a crossword app, just [term for someone with a competitive and high-achieving personality].

https://xkcd.com/2957/

[#] Fri Jul 12 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: Hatchery

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Anadromous fish are more vulnerable in rivers, since the lack of salt means you can quickly crack passwords using rainbow trout tables.

https://xkcd.com/2958/

[#] Mon Jul 15 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: Beam of Light

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Einstein's theories solved a longstanding mystery about Mercury: Why it gets so hot. "It's because," he pointed out, "the sun is right there."

https://xkcd.com/2959/

[#] Wed Jul 17 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: Organ Meanings

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IMO the thymus is one of the coolest organs and we should really use it in metaphors more.

https://xkcd.com/2960/

[#] Fri Jul 19 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: CrowdStrike

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We were going to try swordfighting, but all my compiling is on hold.

https://xkcd.com/2961/

[#] Mon Jul 22 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: President Venn Diagram

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Hard to imagine political rhetoric more microtargeted at me than 'I love Venn diagrams. I really do, I love Venn diagrams. It's just something about those three circles.'

https://xkcd.com/2962/

[#] Wed Jul 24 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: House Inputs and Outputs

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People think power over ethernet is so great, and yet when I try to do water over ethernet everyone yells at me.

https://xkcd.com/2963/

[#] Fri Jul 26 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: Olympic Sports

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Thankfully for everyone involved, the Winter Olympics officials spotted me and managed to stop me before I got to the ski jump.

https://xkcd.com/2964/

[#] Mon Jul 29 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: Chili Tornado Quake

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Buildings constructed from softer materials were damaged by chili pepper impacts to the storm's high Richter-Fujita-Scoville-Mohs hardness rating.

https://xkcd.com/2965/

[#] Wed Jul 31 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: Exam Numbers

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Calligraphy exam: Write down the number 37, spelled out, nicely.

https://xkcd.com/2966/

[#] Fri Aug 02 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: Matter

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He was the first person to land a 900, which is especially impressive because pulling off a half-integer spin requires obeying Fermi-Dirac statistics.

https://xkcd.com/2967/

[#] Mon Aug 05 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: University Age

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This only makes it more urgent that we adopt my roadmap for the next 10 years, which should put us solidly in the lead.

https://xkcd.com/2968/

[#] Wed Aug 07 2024 04:00:00 UTC from rss <>

Subject: Vice President First Names

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[Political pundit on the ScrabbleTV News channel] "After four years of defying orthographic pressure, Joe ceded the top of the ticket to Kamala, who--after considering Josh, Mark, Andy, Roy, and Pete--picked Tim."

https://xkcd.com/2969/

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